Friday, September 21, 2012

It's been a week and I haven't ordered the new iPhone yet. That's progress!

My name is Sara, and I’m an Apple-aholic.

Hi Sara.

Thanks. Like most of you here, it started years ago with an iPod. Just a little, 32GB iPod. Everyone else already had one. I tried to be a good girl and just use my little non-Apple mp3 player, but everyone made fun of it. So I gave in to the peer pressure and tried my first Apple product. I’d seen my dad using them, so really, how much harm could there be in trying something Apple?

And at first, I had it under control. That one iPod was enough for me for a long time. True, I started toting it everywhere with me, just in case. And yes, I used it to hide from uncomfortable social situations. Turn it on, slip those little white earbuds in, and suddenly I felt good again. Was it a crutch? Yes. But I couldn’t see that at the time because it was just one little iPod.


I should have known there was a problem when I had to have it wired into my car because I just couldn’t function without it. And when I would panic if I didn’t have it with me. But one little iPod can’t hurt you, right?

But then I got my MacBook Pro. I’d had a Dell laptop (which, admittedly, I had wanted because they came in colors. I’m a girl. Deal with it.). And that’s when the addiction really got bad. Because I never wanted to touch that old Dell again once I had my MacBook. Oh no. Everything just felt RIGHT when I used my Mac. Everything worked.  There were no more viruses to worry about.  No left button/right button confusion. And I felt superior to all those PC people who had to hit “CTRL” instead of “Command.” Losers.

And I didn’t even have an iPhone or an iPad! Clearly I wasn’t an addict. Addicts couldn’t be away from their Mac products for longer than three seconds without dying like the the guy who drank from the wrong cup in the third Indiana Jones movie. I, on the other hand, chose wisely.  I could leave my iPod in my purse for most of the day and be fine.


That’s how they suck you in though. That MacBook is a gateway drug. Because it came with a free iPod touch. Which meant that I was using Apple more than ever. I could leave my old iPod in the car and use the touch for everything else. I could even use it to get online when I had wifi and was away from my computer.  Which, yes, I could do with my Blackberry, but it was just BETTER with an Apple product.


And oh how I clung to that Blackberry! I saw how addicted my dad had become to the Apple way of life, and I know that addictions are hereditary.  I didn’t want to go that route. So I vowed never to get an iPhone! Never to get an iPad! Never to fall prey to that Apple-induced madness that possesses addicts every time a new product is announced! Oh no, not me! I didn’t have a problem! I could stop any time I wanted to.

Addicts, however, tend to surround themselves with other addicts to justify their behavior. And my parents are no different. Like the worst of smokers and drinkers, I started using my parents’ iPads when they weren’t looking. A websearch here. A Facebook update there. An email. A YouTube video. A round of Words With Friends. But they caught on. And because they don’t see their own addictions as a problem, instead of castigating me, they bought me an iPad for my birthday last year. The Apple TV quickly followed suit.


And after that, there was no turning back. I woke up at 2:45am the night that the iPhone 4S went on sale to make sure I was alert enough to order mine EXACTLY at 3am. I claimed I had a doctor’s appointment and left school early the day it was delivered--the FIRST day that anyone could have one, to rush home to set it up. Behavior that a non-addict would find simply appalling.




I couldn’t stop though. I popped apps like they were TicTacs. I spent countless hours installing things I didn’t need, had no use for, but craved because they were there and they enhanced my Apple products like nothing else could. I preferred texting other Apple users because they too acted like our behavior was normal. They got it. And with iMessage, I could see when they were replying to me. And we could send emojis. Non-Apple users didn’t understand and judged us for preferring the company of other Apple-aholics. Clearly THEY were the ones with the problems.  Not us.  Never us. And even if some of my friends were addicted, I wasn't.  I couldn't be an addict. 


But when they announced the new iPhone 5 and I actually debated spending $700 on one because my contract isn’t up for another year, I realized that I had a serious problem. Buying the iPhone 5 was the equivalent of going SEVEN Springsteen shows. (Okay, three with Ticketmaster fees. But still). I have bills to pay. A mortgage. A schnauzer to feed. And I was actually debating spending that much money just to get the new iPhone a few months earlier.  Not good.


Maybe there was a way though.  The day that the announcement was made, I tried to figure out if I could make the money.  But when I posted this on my Facebook (JOKINGLY):


And got THIS as a reply from someone who shall remain nameless, but whom I will from now on refer to as the Creepiest Person I Know:

I realized my addiction had gone too far.  (NO I DID NOT CONSIDER HIS OFFER.  I'm NOT that bad!  But that is a REAL, UNEDITED message that I got the night that the iPhone announcement was made.  SCARY.)

So I’m taking a stand. I’m going to try to break the cycle of addiction. I can make do with the 4S with the upgraded iOS6, which does let it do most of the same stuff as the iPhone 5.  No, it doesn’t have the slightly different body to let everyone know immediately that my phone is superior to theirs in every possible way. But I’m strong. I can manage. And, God willing, with the help of other Apple-aholics out there who are also fighting the urge to spend $700 on a slightly better phone just because it’s new and Apple makes it, I can resist the daily temptation to buy the iPhone 5. I know the craving won’t ever actually go away. But I just need to take it one day at a time.


That’s all any of us can do, right?

It’s been on sale for pre-orders for over a week now. I’ve made it a week so far.  And that’s longer than I ever thought I would be able to last. It’s been hard.  Especially because my dad ordered his right when they went on sale. And I was lying there in bed, staring at the ceiling, praying that I would have the strength to stay away from my MacBook.  Because I knew that as soon as I sat down at that screen, I wouldn’t be able to resist going to the Apple homepage and ordering that phone. But I’ve made it this far, and I keep hoping I’ll have the strength to resist even when I see other people with the new iPhone.


Damn you, Steve Jobs! I feel your icy grip clutching me from beyond the grave!


God, I want that phone.
Stolen from http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apple

3 comments:

  1. I have the iPhone 5. Just thought I'd tell you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Y'know, I know how the feeling feels... sort of. I thought the iPad was ridiculously priced, you could buy a pretty decent computer for the same amount. I never owned an iPod because, well, I never really needed it. I had a Blackberry Pearl for a little while, and it was pretty cool, but it broke and I simply didn't have the money to replace it. My family all had iDevices, but I lived far enough from them that I never really saw it. My wife brought an iPod 2nd Gen (the one that pretty much can't use any modern apps but still plays media quite nicely) into our marriage when we got married three years ago. A year after we were married our daughter was born and suddenly the iPod I was using to teach aerobics classes was hooked up to some speakers and being used as our colicky daughters lullaby machine. I got to use the 2nd Gen. for a little while, but it wasn't for apps, it was only for the music and since it was my wife's I didn't really want to play with it too much (she had a lot of dates/notes/etc., that I didn't want to accidentally erase). Besides, even if I had really gotten into it, it was a 2nd Gen. and couldn't really do much anyways (can't even play Angry Birds on it).

    However, I still needed a music-playing device I could use for work as if I had to teach a class while my daughter needed to sleep it didn't work well. Thus, I turned to the newly-released iPod Nano 6th Gen. I bought a watch band for it to clip to and had a very nifty, very sophisticated iPod Watch. It was beautiful. Yet, it couldn't use any apps nor play movies. This led me to the start of my iLove.

    One day I saw the iPod 4th Gen. go on sale. I figured, "hey, why not?" as I was no longer teaching aerobics and didn't need a small iDevice anymore, plus the iPod had some cool apps to help me drop weight and get in shape (Fitocracy for instance). The iPod 4th Gen. hadn't been updated in 2 years and tons of rumors were saying it never would, that only the iPhone would from now on. Then a week after I got it I learned they were making an iPod 5th Gen. A week with the 4th Gen. sealed my addiction. I never had to have quiet time, ever.
    Sitting at a doctors office? Super Scribblenauts.
    Doing research that requires my entire monitor?
    Big Bang Theory on my iPod. Tedious task of cooking? Lord of the Rings on my iPod.
    Any time I was bored I could just turn to the iPod and had a massive amount of things to do on it. I had it for one week, but it was practically the same level of importance as a limb. With wireless, Bluetooth headphones, I was almost always listening to something, and it was great.

    However, I am a techie at heart, plus it was having some Bluetooth problems. Once I realized the iPod 5th Gen was coming out, I returned the 4th Gen. I pre-orded the iPod 5th Gen, though I was on the fence about forking the money for an A6-chipped iPhone for a little while (since it's supposed to be double the iPod 5th Gen's A5 chip) but it just wasn't practical to pay full-price on my budget if it wasn't going to be my phone.

    Anyway, I'm amazed that in one week I became decently addicted to the iPod. I find myself constantly looking online to figure out when the iPod 5th Gen will be released (still no info other than "October") and missing all that the iPod brought with it. I still can't believe how much you can do with it and how I lived without one for so long.

    So what I'm saying is that, while it's not probably to the same extent (or length) your story of the addiction was/is, I do understand how it's easy to fall into the trap of Apple's amazing tech. and how hard it is to break free (or even want to break free, lol).

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ha! And have you seen this vid? It's hilarious.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGnYUtU_tWw&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    ReplyDelete